![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Was not here for ages
I did not write here for a long time. Life had become very busy. But i feel a need to return, as writing is one of my main tools to handle fear and well, terror.
The last few weeks were too good, and now i fear i am coming apart again. I feel a rise in anxiety, fatigue and pain. I feel an increase in dissociation and a decrease in my awarenece and handling abilty to handle this, and i am terrefied. It's like feeling myself falling down in slow motion, seeing the horrible days of the winter hunting me down again, and i fear i will loose the battle against my worst enomy:myself.
My resourses are limited, my workload increasing, i am about to start a new course in three month. If i will not stablise my self untill than, a complete breakdown is certain.
The last few weeks were too good, and now i fear i am coming apart again. I feel a rise in anxiety, fatigue and pain. I feel an increase in dissociation and a decrease in my awarenece and handling abilty to handle this, and i am terrefied. It's like feeling myself falling down in slow motion, seeing the horrible days of the winter hunting me down again, and i fear i will loose the battle against my worst enomy:myself.
My resourses are limited, my workload increasing, i am about to start a new course in three month. If i will not stablise my self untill than, a complete breakdown is certain.
no subject
:(
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject