ernads: (rain)
So much rain! it really looked like someone took a big bucket and spilled it on our heads. Fun.

This time I took precautions as soon as I looked out of the window and saw the clouds forming. I have here little sweater and a raincoat. So I can apply my favorite Dress Winter code. (Layers, lots of them.)

Oh. And one common factor I’m sure of that runs like a thread between all my fuckups, without exception – they all occured when I’m all wore down into a Zombie state. Fatigue, complete fatigue. It makes me blind and unable to see even things that are right under my eyes. There is a kind of short circuses between my eyes and the translator in my mind.

Another common factor – not being able to see beyond the Now, the moment. Not being able to make connections and see from A to B to C. Or sometimes leaping right from A to C and missing something in between. *sigh*

Anyhow. Today I feel better. Yesterday I decided to which back – took the 30G in the evening, and the 60g in the morning. For some reason which I do not understand it works better this way. So I will not argue with it. Also, my kitty slept a bit with me – till he begin to bounce around and play soccer ball (with me as the Gate of course, as usual). Then I kicked him out gently.

We took the poor little cat to the vet yesterday – he was very, very unhappy with us, to put it mildly. It’s the fourth time in four weeks, and I bet he remembers every single times – because he no longer cooperates with the Tuna trick. So I came over to the clinic after work to help with him and hold him. And you know, I am always awed that even when he is shaking and terrified, and I’m holding him with my hands in an easily accessible place – he does not even attempt to bite or scratch. He fights , all right, and twists like an eel. (he is also so soft and smooth, so it’s really hard to restrain him). But there is not a slightest bit of aggression in that animal. Even the vet admitted she has never seen the like of him. She adored him.

Oh, and I tried to clean house with G around…is hilarious. He will drop whatever he is doing to come and tassel with the broom, wrap his body around it, throw himself in front of it,splash in the dirt all over – and then stretch his longgggggggg body and smile at me. (I swear, I hear him saying “here, let’s see you now, that’s dirt mine and you aren’t going to take it).

And in a month or so we will have little Yael with us! Our house is becoming rich.
ernads: (rain)
So: he is what J-m looks like right now:

besieged J-M

Last night the roads to our capital city were blocked, and hundreds of people were stuck outside, in the cold, for many hours, without any ability to reach home. Oh, god. My heart out to them, I am cold inside the doors, and they are stick outside all night.

No, this storm is really the worst I recall. I mean, the country is an emergency mode, the army is moving up to J-M to help rescue people, emergency shelters are being opened, with Israelis volunteering to help and assist - and one good thing about Israelis - they are the worlds best volunteers. They are amazing in those situations.

You know what this reminds me? Of the Great Fire three years ago, when 40 people where burned alive in the bus, and many others were at risk and evacuated. And than, also, every one who could - helped.

It's raining buckets here, and I braved the rains to go to the doc to get my reference. And also, got a vaccine against flu - my immune system sucks,so I am at a high risk.

We are waiting for the DG to come and take us to PT and I am not happy with it - if he is not already out on the road we will postpone it - this is not the climate to go out. I am not going out to the Gym either, not in this rain. And I fear that Shear and Yehoda will not be able to come cause the roads are not in the best state right now.

Yeah, we caught him on time and postpone to Sunday. I am not willing to go out in the out in the weather. And I think that lunch is soup today.

God, Chanel two is broadcasting live - just like any emergency situation.

(you know what I discovered right now? When I type real slow, and say the words out loud in my mind, I can type with much less spelling mistakes. It will not eliminate the problem, cause I still do not hear right many words, but - it will help. Nice).
ernads: an empty room (an empty room)
I am at work, about to begin my shift (there is no speller here, on those computers. please parden any possible spelling mistakes.) Access my computer, read mail, and find a "request" for a meeting from S: One of my superiors. The one who is harder on me, and treats me like dirt whenever I make a mistake. Which means she is about to kick my ass, and hard.

I am - scared. I don't know what to do. How to justify all those mistakes. I don'tt know if to admit I might have some sort of disorder problem as an explanetion. Why should they care, after all? This is a workplace. All they care for here is production. If you do not fit in, well...

I do not fit in. I did not fit in any system I was ever part of. It is so painfully obvious, now.

I don't know what to do. How to fix this. Advise is welcome.
ernads: Fenic (Default)
Read more... )
ernads: Fenic (Default)
There, I feel better now, after fixing many mistakes I found in in previous posts, which I was unaware of and were pointed out to me today. I am very grateful for it; One of my aims in posting is improving my English. Correction is very welcome.

Also marked quite a large difference between the general tone of post from before and after the Check-up. Most of the posts from the last few days are depressive. I hope things will be better soon.

I am going to to K&I for sushi night, which will hopefully help me to recover. They are quite a good company usually, and sushi is always Comfort-Food.

Well I have 5 minutes or so to get ready, so I better get going.

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ernads: Fenic (Default)
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